“Joyce is right about history being a nightmare –but it may be the nightmare from which no one can awaken. People are trapped in history and history is trapped in them.” –James Baldwin, “Stranger in the Village.”
If you follow me through social media you know I’m used to visiting plantation landscapes and dressing in the type of clothing enslaved people would wear. I’ve cooked the enslaved way in many states across the former Confederacy and Border states. I’ve picked cotton and worked in tobacco fields. I’ve been in rice and sugarcane fields in the Lowcountry and Lower Mississippi Valley dodging teenaged gators and poisonous snakes. Plantations blind with darkness don’t scare me and I almost take comfort from the spirits that have surrounded me. I have been in their presence—for real—and the ancestors have been both welcoming…
View original post 1,835 more words
Alright, everyone. I know we can’t agree on everything. Or most things. Or anything. I know this world is full of strife and contention, controversy and division. I get it.
This is what it means to live on a mortal planet populated by the fallen hordes of sinful, prideful, vengeful beings. We argue, it’s what we do. And, honestly, I guess that’s good for business. I make a living writing about ‘controversial’ topics. What would I do if I lived in a land where nobody argued about anything? The good news is that if I found myself in a place of that sort, I’d presumably be in Heaven. But the bad news is that I’d be really hard up for blogging topics.
In any case, as much as I appreciate a good ol’ fashioned, knock ’em down, drag ’em out online cyber-brawl, I think it’s time we retire a few of these debates.
View original post 1,358 more words
Today marks an important day for word users and language speakers everywhere. It’s National Grammar Day! There are all kinds of ways to celebrate this special occasion: Proofread an e-mail message before you hit “send.” Show some Facebook friends you care by correcting their grammatical mistakes in the comments section of their posts. Read a grammatical page-turner, like Woe Is I or Eats, Shoots & Leaves. Try your hand at a quick Facebook editing contest hosted by Grammarly, called “Edit This.” Or, for goodness’ sake, just take care to craft a structurally sound sentence with all your commas and apostrophes in the right places.
In honor of the holiday, here are 10 heartfelt sentiments to send to someone you love. Enjoy!
In honor of the day, tell us—which grammatical mistake makes your skin crawl?
Apparently universities are issuing guidelines to help professors consider adding “trigger warnings” to syllabi for “racism, classism, sexism, heterosexism, cissexism, ableism, and other issues of privilege and oppression,” and to remove triggering material when it doesn’t “directly” contribute to learning goals.” This from New Republic this week.
I have no desire to enter the fray of online discussions on trigger warnings and sensitivity. I have used trigger warnings. Most recently, I made a personal decision to not retweet Dylan Farrow’s piece in the New York Times detailing Woody Allen’s sexual abuse. I was uncomfortable shoving a very powerful description at people without some kind of warning. I couldn’t read past the first three sentences. I couldn’t imagine how it read for others. So, I referenced the article with a trigger warning and kept it moving.
But, I’m not sure that’s at all the kind of deliberation universities are doing with…
View original post 457 more words
About two weeks ago, my daughter and I were out getting food. While we were preparing to leave an older gentleman approached the car. He said “I ain’t asking you for food someone already bought me something, but I am a veteran and I don’t have anywhere to stay. I work everyday but I can’t afford a place to live and sometimes what I make I can’t get a room at the boarding house”. He preceded to show me the standard hospital band that showed he had just gotten out of the veteran’s hospital and began to tell me his back story. While he was talking I was barely listening. I had already made up my mind that I wouldn’t give him anything. But I changed my mind. I proceeded to tell my daughter to give me a five dollar bill out of my purse. But the Spirit led me to give him 20 dollars, enough to pay for the room he needed at the boarding house and enough to get something to eat later on. He went on to say that women help him more than men, that they just rolled their windows up and ignored him. I too was tempted to do the same, to pass judgement, to say that he needed to get a job, to ask his family or many other excuses we give for not being kind to one another. What made me change my mind was the Spirit showing me that, he could be me. That he IS me. Life happens. All too often we live with a false sense of security. We think that nothing will touch us, we will always have what we have. We foolishly think that our health, our looks, our wealth, our family will be there. We walk around condescending others for not working hard enough, not pulling up their bootstraps and grinding. At the end of our exchange he said “I would hug you but I am dirty”. I instantly gave him a hug. I wanted to let him know that regardless of his condition, he mattered, he was still loved. I could empathize with his struggle. I know that it a moment I could be where he is. Needing a helping hand. I HAVE been where he is and someone helped me out. I think that if we would all begin to live with the realization that life happens, that at any moment everything we have can be taken away we would be more human, more apt to help, to love, to live in the moment. Although I have had many encounters with homeless people, this was one that touched me a lot as I could see my family there. Living with what we are going through right now I understand what it means to need to be seen as human, as valuable and able or for someone to just stop and give you 20 dollars and a hug.
This list is self explanatory and very relevant for today and always.
Most people have it wrong.
Most folks think that by gathering more stuff,
they’ll finally find happiness.
But often, you can find true happiness RIGHT NOW,
in this moment, simply by letting go.
Here are 4 things that you can let go of that will
make you a happier, more peaceful person by the
time you hit the sack tonight:
1) Let go of the need to impress others.
If you’re a human being, chances are you care about
what other people think of you.
After all – we are naturally social creatures!
But if you find yourself spending too much of your
time, money or energy trying to impress other people
and get their approval, you’re not being true to YOU.
There’s no need to try and be something you’re not,
because who you are right now is FABULOUS!
Focus instead on living the most authentic version
When you fully embrace who you are and share it with
others, you’ll find that people will appreciate how
REAL you are and will flock to you effortlessly. 🙂
2) Let go of the need to be right.
Sometimes when we feel we’ve been mistreated or
misunderstood by someone, we can get caught up
into wanting that person to admit they’ve
And we want an apology!
Or at least acknowledgement that we are right and they’re
The problem is that not all human beings see things
from the same perspective. In your world, you’re
right… but in their world, so are they.
There are definitely times where an apology is necessary.
But most other times, rather than allowing feelings of
negativity to take root inside you and start spilling
over into other areas of your life, it may be best to
ask yourself this:
“Do I want to be right? Or do I want to be happy?”
Often it’s just our ego that keeps us holding on to past
resentments and upsets. Instead, consider letting go of
the desire to be right and you’ll find you’ll instantly
restore happiness and contentment in your life.
3) Let go of the desire to gossip.
I’ve heard it said that gossip is just a cheap way to make
yourself feel good, and I have to agree.
We all know that gossiping about other people is… well, not
But when the people around you are doing it, it can be easy to
slip into doing it, too!
Consider though that the quality of your life depends on the
quality of the conversations you have.
If you want to live a more fulfilling life, start by embracing
the power of your word. Your voice is powerful! And what you
have to say makes a difference.
Be committed to having more positive conversations about
things that matter… not people… and you’ll be surprised how
quickly you’ll brighten your outlook on life.
4) Let go of the past.
It’s easy to dwell on the past, especially when the future is
Looking to the past can feel safe… we know what has happened
and we know what we could do to change things… if only we
had the chance.
The truth is, though, that you never will have the chance to
change the past.
Not unless scientists finally invent a time machine. 😉
Your past has served its purpose – it’s brought you to the
place you are today and made you the person you are now.
And who you are right now is absolutely perfect.
Be grateful for your experiences, but know that NOW is all
you have. So do your best to enjoy each moment. Give
yourself the gift of being present!
To your everlasting happiness,
I have been feeling foggy, tired, irritable and pretty much ever other blahhhhh feeling there is out there. Having just delivered 12 weeks ago I wasn’t expecting to feel like super mom, but neither was I expecting to be completely deflated, so I decided to detox. I decided on a natural herbal detox called Essence of Vitality. It has several herbs with the star of the show being Neem. From what I have heard it is VERY bitter and because I am scared I haven’t tried it yet. However I am going to such it up and start today. I will detail my thoughts and results here. I cannot wait for the positive side effects.